The Ladies Lifestyle

My 2 Favs I am no stranger to illness and being sick, hence, Periods Should Knot Be Painful . I have been what people call, "sickly" for a large portion of my life. From vomiting, having high fevers, and being bedridden EVERY Christmas until I was about 18, to being plagued with diseases like Endometriosis, PCOS, Adenomyosis, Rheumatoid Arthritis, Diabetes, etc. Because I was sick often, I commonly heard comments like, she is always sick, you always in pain, you will never have kids, what's wrong with her now, and other bull crap. It was words like this that made me absolutely hate the sick portion of myself. I didn't want to be ill. I didn't ask to be ill. I didn't have a say in deciding what my body chose to do but I was somehow at fault for all the ills that continuously overtook me. So as a child, I divided myself into two people, there was the Sick Me and the Well Me. When I would become sick, I would hide in my mom's room, she would eithe...

If there is any advantage to living with an invisible illness, it is the invisible aspect. While this element often comes with more challenges than benefits, there are still a few benefits. However, with an Invisible Illness like PCOS, there are a few outward signs that will give an indication that something is going on in a woman's body. All of my Reproductive Life, I have had issues. From the very young age of 11 to this present day, my period continues to be a daily challenge for me. On the other hand, it was my period or should I say the disappearance of my period that told me something abnormal was going on in my body. It would take years and several doctors before I was diagnosed with PCOS.  Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome(PCOS) is a hormonal disorder of the Endocrine System in women. Woman with PCOS suffer with internal issues like ovarian cysts, infertility, irregular periods, and so much more. Unlike diseases like Endometriosis, Adenomyosis, Menorrhagia, etc; PCOS does have ...

As I reflect on 2015 and all that I have learned in this year, I realized that I have never really shared me on my blogs. I talk about Endometriosis, Life, etc, and while those things are apart of my life, they are not the totality of who I am. So here are, 40 random, funny, weird, but factual things about me: 1. My name is Tamika(that should tell you the year in which I was born) 2. I turned 40 this year(no excuse for you to not have figured out the year of my birth) 3. I am the baby of my siblings 4. I was born and raised in Detroit! I bleed the 313 5. I am a mom but I have never given birth(take that infertility) 6. I am obsessed with all things hair, make up, and nails, like an unhealthy, a well laid sew in is orgasmic, probably needs to be looked into obsession 7. My parents and grandparents are deceased, I often feel like I am alone in this world. 8. I have a blankey that I have had since I was very young, I can't sleep without it, it goes everywhere with me, EVER...

You've felt it before, the ache, the burning, the awareness that your body is awakening to stimulation. Now, disconnect those sensations from pain.  Because we are women who battle illnesses of the reproductive areas, we have become so accustomed to pain. We have a challenging time embracing any other feelings in our bodies. Yes, pain is a part of our existence but we have to learn how to stop it from hijacking our entire physical being.  If you are serious about regaining your sex life, the first step is to get reacquainted with yourself, with your body.  Recognize that there is more to you than Endometriosis, Pelvic Pain, Infertility, PCOS, etc.  Your body is capable of experiencing pleasure and passion. The only thing standing between you and luxuriously Labia swelling, clitoral climaxing,  lovemaking  that leads to orgasmic euphoria is, YOU ! There are a few things that you need to do to rediscover your body. The most important being, change your perce...

There is nothing more human than the desire to connect with another person on a physically intimate level. The pull of passion, the eroticism of an embrace, the sensual assault on the senses, breathless bodies climbing to the height of climax; all of these things make sex one of the greatest experiences of human existence. There are very few things that are as addictive as an orgasm, especially if it's done right! The consuming explosion of  a hormonal cocktail that is powerful enough to give you a high that is beyond comprehension, is what keeps us craving the carnal caresses of intercourse. Unfortunately, there are some who have challenges enjoying sex because of Chronic Pelvic Pain caused by illnesses like Endometriosis, Vulvodynia, PFD, etc. For women battling these physical aliments, the mere thought of sex can be overwhelming, daunting, and terrifying. Because I have struggled in this area, I feel that I am more than capable of helping women reclaim their love of lascivious...

In general closure answers the question why . As humans, we want to know why . If we know why, we can embrace our circumstances and make peace with it but what do we do when we don't know why ? What do we do when closure means accepting what is but not understanding why it is? If a person has HIV/AIDS they know why they have it. If a person smoked and ended up with Lung Cancer, they know why . These people possess the ability to accept their condition and either fight it or give in to. The bottom line is they know why and in that knowing, if they desire, they can find closure. Yet, the question remains, what do you do when you don't know why? How do you embrace something that has no known reason or cause? How do you accept an enemy when you don't know where it came from or why it has invaded your life? How do you fight the invisible? This is a question that women like me find ourselves struggling to answer each and everyday.  As I sat in the bathtub today, why me...

I have been on this journey of Chronic Pelvic Pain and Illness for more than a decade. During this phase of my life I have done everything that I can possibly do to get rid of this enemy that has invaded my body. I have taken many, many, many, medications, had spinal injections, physical therapy, changed what i eat, had several surgeries, had devices implanted that nearly killed me, took Lupron for 9 months, and a host of other failed attempts at taking back my body and my life. Lately, the pain has continued to intensify and cause other problems. Unfortunately, nothing seems to work, nothing dulls the pain, nothing suppresses the complications, this enemy combination of Endometriosis and Chronic Pelvic Pain continue to incapacitate me daily in one way or another. Like my doctors, I am at the end of my rope and ready to jump. After two more ultrasounds and some testing, my GYN and I have decided that A Full Hysterectomy is my best hope for some freedom and relief. Before you say it, Ye...

Before you can begin to understand why there are specific things that you should not say to women battling infertility, allow me to educate you on the subject matter.  Infertility is a woman's inability to conceive or carry a pregnancy full term. I should note that there are two types of infertility, Primary and Secondary.  Primary Infertility causes a woman to be unable to get pregnant. Secondary Infertility is the inability to get pregnant after being able to conceive at least once.  Now that I have provided a basic definition of infertility, lets move onto the conversational etiquette that is needed when approaching the topic of pregnancy with a woman dealing with  infertility.   Girl, when are you going to have a baby? If you wait any longer, you won't be able have any . Don't assume that because she hasn't had any kids by 35 that its a choice. Humans are so proficient at looking from the outside in and making judgments. Because you ...

 Many of us who suffer due to  Invisible Illnesses are often faced with the possibility of having to resign from our careers. This decision comes from months or years of working while in pain, declines in job performance, and an increase in absences.  To add insult to illness, when you seek Disability Insurance from the state that you have worked for, paid taxes to, and funded the insurance benefits and monetary support for others, you are forced to PROVE that you are "disabled" enough to qualify for money that has been taken from your earnings for years.  It is this Ignored but Controversial dilemma that sparked this post. As I write this post, I am waiting to go before a judge. It has been 3 long years of appointments, tests, questionnaires, digging, and being denied 3 times. My savings, my car, my home, and retirement funds are gone, along with my ability to be employable in a career field.  So then the question becomes, what is more important in determining...

You See Me Not My Pain? What does that mean? When you live with the pain and complications of Invisible Illness, you will find that people will judge you solely based on your appearance. To the eye you look perfectly fine. You don't have any deformities. You aren't in a wheelchair. You can talk, hear, and see BUT you are sick. Sadly, while you look fine externally, internally, you feel like you are being eaten alive by an enemy that you can't see.  You are in pain. You are exhausted. You are a ball of anxiety/depression. Yet, no one can see your struggle because it is COMPLETELY invisible to the naked eye. Most humans, including medical professionals have a difficult time embracing and accepting something that they can't see. By instinct, a person's first impression is commonly based on outward appearances. We live in an instant society, nobody has time for anything, we are all rushing to get here or there.  Getting people to truly SEE you takes time and...

This is going to be a random, probably all over the place post.  2014 was such a challenge for me, physically, mentally, and emotionally. However, I had a long talk with myself and I got fussed at often by My Shae about getting back to writing and vlogging. So, I AM BAAACCCCKKK!!! In 2015, I plan to do much more to help raise awareness for women and their families who battle illnesses and/or malfunctions of the Reproductive organs/areas. There are so many of us suffering but we are not well represented in the media, especially on Youtube.  However, I am going to do my best to remedy this situation and I hope that my efforts will spark an outcry in our community and provide us with more representation in the media.  We need daily visibility not just in March on our AWESOME March for Awareness. Our issues need and deserve more exposure. My first task is to resurrect our yout Periods Should NOT Be Painful Youtube Channel ube channel. Currently, I am working on it, I have add...